I really love my kid, but it is hard to be by myself with her all day. She is my little side kick and we do so many things together, but sometimes mommy gets selfish and wants grown up time. I don't really like to go out that much and I don't really need adult time like all night out...I just want to go to the grocery store by myself some time or talk to other grown ups.
The hardest part about being laid off is that they money that I would have had for child care is gone, so I don't get to take adult time in the middle of the day. I can't do a ladies lunch anymore or meet people after work at the driving range. I can go to the driving range, but I have to push her carriage and set her up to watch me and play and only buy a small bucket of balls in case she doesn't want to golf any more. Everything revolves around Elle and that is a blessing. I am glad I do not have to make her fit my arbitrary schedule...but I would love a bit more arbitrary in my schedule!
We all feel this way. :o) Children are such an amazing blessing and it seems so incredibly selfish to want a few hours a week to have adult time but in reality it is the only way to be a better parent. I find myself more patient, involved, and just overall more happy when I get just a little bit of time alone or time with other adults. Caring for our children is by far the most rewarding job however, it is a 24hr job that requires the selflessness and patience of a saint. You are doing an amazing job by the way!
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